I ony have 17 minutes to write this entry, before I prepare for school. and I’m making this just to release my stress.
(listening to castle in the sky)
one week to go before the the capping ceremony and I’m excited to wear our new uniform, well it’s not really about the new outfit, but it’s the feeling of fulfillment. I have put a lot of effort into this path and leaving it is the last thing I will ever do. life has been more generous to me this past few days, I just hope that I don’t get used to this state of life that when reality comes back, it’ll hit me harder. Triggered emotions, I haven’t felt this way for years. The feeling of happiness when you see someone (even just the sight of his name) makes you smile and completes your day that you never want to go to sleep because you’re afraid that you might not wake up the next morning. To hear his voice and laughter that plays like music in your ears and acts like a healing potion to your broken soul. His smile that sparkles like the myriad stars in the darkness of the night. You feel perfectly happy and content just sitting next to that someone (4 minutes to go). But the inevitable fear of falling draws you back and tells you to stop or else when he’s gone, you’ll die again. Living with a dead soul is the hardest thing you’ve ever done. So don’t push your luck and entertain obscure feelings, just enjoy and see what happens
