5pm society of the veranda

Another once in a lifetime thing is happening on friday and things get a little slow for us nursing students, which is good since we’ve been working like robots with no proper sleeping habits like 2-3 hours of sleep is already rejuvinating.

I’ve been under this organization at school since the 2nd semester of 2nd year when I unintentionally took the exam to get in, next thing I know I was being interviewed by my superiors and after that we were taken to baguio for a journalism conference. It was fun being with the people in that group, the bonding, A LOT of singing and a little dancing, pop-up debates (usually initiated by bryan), philosophical thinking on how cruel at the same time happy life is and everyday conrversations that became an almost everyday routine.

The small talks is starting to be like heroine, you can’t get enough of it, like something in you tells you to have more everyday (haven’t taken them but that’s how they descrivbe the drug). Its good to have some people to converse with about everything under the sun; love, studies, morality, gender inequality, and other stuff that gets the nerves working like hell. You have to state your opinion every now and then, laugh when someone cracks a joke or even get sad when reality bites. Earlier today, we were dismissed ahead of time and I was really relieved to go home with the sun still up. But as I was trying to leave the building I saw my batch mates and they told me we still have singing lessons for the ceremony on Friday. Dismayed, I went back to the office in the intention of leaving my things so I can attend the practice, but like magnet I was pulled on staying in the office and chat with my friends till the practice is over (I couldn’t sneak out because I’m afraid to get caught not attending).

I saw dom eating kerrimo ( 2 in 1 snack composed of softdrinks and bite size goodies) thrilled to see that the store where he bought the stuff re-opened, I had them accompany me in buying it. On our way to the cafeteria the repartee started and as usual, I was on the mood to fight the three of them back. dom, noli jerome and me (the only girl) went to buy our merienda. While waiting for our orders to be served we talked about how one of them has a “greener” mind than the other, how dom always laughs when someone in the office talks about something he thinks has another meaning. Weird but its one of our typical topics. When we got our food, we went back and walked the easier path going back to the fourth floor where the office resides. Jerome entered the room first and to our surprise he went out again saying that bryan and erickson is having an “intimate discussion” and we wouldn’t want to disturb them, so we opened the veranda.

The veranda, one of the scenic places in the campus overlooking the LRT station, an old gov’t building next to a wide open space that used to be a parking lot, tall buildings and the basketball court beneath us. But the best part is the sky, which never seize to amaze me everytime we opened the door like its an entrance to a secret sacred place. At an instant the palaver started with noli telling some stories and the three of us listened, we had our turns in telling our own stories with whatever one wants to share or come up with, spontaneous barking that’s how I can describe it. When someone is talking somebody else has to have a comment on that and it would lead to another topic which another person would react to that will lead to another topic and therefore an endless cycle of intellectual nonsense chats. That’s how our life is almost everyday, after cramming for days or hours just to create one page of formed sentences from interviews and gathered data, we talk and talk until someone says “tara uwi na tayo” then everybody would leave and separate paths in the street of San Marcelino.

At the end of the day I end up smiling for a reason I barely  understand, like happiness came from releasing the stress I had that day, remembering my past and sharing my thoughts and ideas and to the people I’m starting to treasure. Now as I walk home alone, I never feel the need to hold somebody’s hand anymore just to know I’m secure, because I’m starting to realize I am now FIXED.

Mabilisan

I ony have 17 minutes to write this entry, before I prepare for school. and I’m making this just to release my stress.

(listening to castle in the sky)

one week to go before the the capping ceremony and I’m excited to wear our new uniform, well it’s not really about the new outfit, but it’s the feeling of fulfillment. I have put a lot of effort into this path and leaving it is the last thing I will ever do. life has been more generous to me this past few days, I just hope that I don’t get used to this state of life that when reality comes back, it’ll hit me harder. Triggered emotions, I haven’t felt this way for years. The feeling of happiness when you see someone (even just the sight of his name) makes you smile and completes your day that you never want to go to sleep because you’re afraid that you might not wake up the next morning.  To hear his voice and laughter that plays like music in your ears and acts like a healing potion to your broken soul. His smile that sparkles like the myriad stars in the darkness of the night. You feel perfectly happy and content just sitting next to that someone (4 minutes to go). But the inevitable fear of falling draws you back and tells you to stop or else when he’s gone, you’ll die again. Living with a dead soul is the hardest thing you’ve ever done. So don’t push your luck and entertain obscure feelings, just enjoy and see what happens

lucky day. oh happy day!

Just an ordinary day turned into a special one. when you realize that you’ve given people what is due to them, there’s this feeling of satisfaction and happiness inside you that you just can’t let the smile fade in your face. Even if smiling alone might look insane to other people, you just don’t care what they’re thinking, all you know and all you want to do is show them how happy you are. After correctly answering a question putting our group back on track, who wouldn’t be happy?! Ok, so maybe not everyone understands what I’m feeling right now.  grades for us white uniformed people is the only thing we think of next to waking up in the morning. Every single quiz counts, recitations are like speeches made in a large crowd that would determine the respect you would get from people listening or silently mocking you. Attitude is something you have to refine if you want to stay in your chosen profession and stop yourself from telling people in control that they are putting to much pressure on you. Patience is a virtue you should stick to your brain cells and not in your heart or else you would be insane. ewww. wait. I’m getting emotional.

A day spent with special people is really something to remember, you get to know them better and laugh with them. It’s been a long time since I’ve laughed like that, not worrying that if I get too happy I would end up crying. I just realized that there is this “someone” who could make me laugh, smile and make my neurons work double time when talking to him. Not to impress him but to blurt out my thoughts, what I really think about in life, gender equality, chivalry, how the human body works, stuff like that. Things not every man would have the capacity to react on, because there are only few men who think “intellectually”  and still manage to not look like a geek. Debating is one thing many men would avoid rather than speak and prove themselves wrong, they have too much EGO to be branded LOSER. Oh well, I guess writing it here wouldn’t change men in general because in reality they’re really not much of a talker.

Another day spent. Another memory remembered. Another laughter shared. A smile remembered.

Obviously, this entry doesn’t make sense. I don’t intend let most people reading this to understand it anyway.

what Katherine means…

I  just got curious so I typed my name and tada! the meaning of my name.

You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life.
You are also a keeper of knowledge – meaning you don’t spill secrets or spread gossip.
People sometimes think you’re snobby or aloof, but you’re just too deep in thought to pay attention to them.

You are usually the best at everything … you strive for perfection.
You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.
You have the classic “Type A” personality.

You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless – and you have a lot of questions about life.
You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You’re most comfortable when you’re far away from home.
You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble.

You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out.
Success comes rather easily for you… especially in business and academia.
Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You’re a strong person.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.
You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.
At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You’re always up to something.
You have a ton of energy, and most people can’t handle you. You’re very intense.
You definitely are a handful, and you’re likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It’s easy to get you excited… which can be a good or bad thing.
You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don’t stick with any one thing for very long.
You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.
You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.
You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

from this site: http://www.blogthings.com/whatsyournameshiddenmeaningquiz/